You are not stuck.

Pooks and I have been having some very emotional conversations lately. They span a variety of topics, but if Pooks has ever felt anything, she has felt it wholly and deeply. It is just who she is. She is passionate and intuitive and she feels things- ALL things, good, bad, uncomfortable, sad, empathetic- with every fiber of her body.
Tonight's topic was friends and friendships. She is having a bit of a crisis with not feeling like people understand the way she plays or how seriously she takes her play. At one point she said, "What would you call me?" and I said, "You are you." and she got huffy and said, "No, I mean, like, sometimes I think I am too diverse..." (Really, Pooks? Diverse? Oh, the drama)

She was describing the typical playground drama, the cliques and friendships, and I finally just said, "There is something I am going to tell you now that I wish I had understood at your age. You are not stuck. You are NOT STUCK. You are in control of you. You hold all of the power of who you play with, what you play, and who you want to be friends with. That doesn't mean that you aren't nice to everyone and that you don't give everyone a chance. And then even after they have had a chance, you should probably try again, because people change. But you, are by no means, stuck where you are. If you want to play alone, play alone. If you want to try to hang out in other groups, do it. Not everyone has to be on board, and not everyone needs to understand. Sometimes it's better to be "diverse". I just want you to remember, in any situation where you feel unhappy, you have the power to do something to change how you feel about it- even if it's just your perspective. We are never stuck being unhappy. We have the power to change the way we feel about it. We can find the good."

I wrote it on her mirror in dry erase marker. "You are not stuck." She got annoyed, and said, "I don't like mushy things on my mirror!", but I heard her repeat it to herself a couple of times..."I am not stuck".

The world is at your fingertips, my love. You have a million moments in front of you. Life is too precious to be unhappy. You are not stuck. Your life is the very best choose your own adventure book you will ever write. Take control of the pen. I promise, there will be someone out there (besides your mother of course) who can't wait to read your story.